Having an Affair while in a serious relationship

Recently, while grieving the passing of my brother, a friend of mine came and seek my advice. yeah like, I don't my own problem to settle. His BF, well ...ex-bf asked for a separation and my friend was not able accept the separation and seek my advice on it. The conversation was: Me: was there a 3rd person? Him: No and not sure. Me: Were you involve in any person including ONS/affair and was caught? Him: yes, but it was a one time. Me: Why you were involved and was he worth of the trouble? Him: (silent) well, He is good looking... and I felt lonely.. My BF was not paying attention to me... Me: So do you think this is the reason? Him: I think so, because when he found out, he said it had changed the whole situation. Me: and that is why your BF prefers to have a 3some? Him: yes... Me: Did he said the breakup was that? Him: he did mentioned that the affair was among other Owhh well, unfortunately I came to know his BF ... well ex-bf, were already looking "casual fun" way before my friend was caught having an affair. So, your BF was caught and you weren't. Does that made any difference? no, both of you are the same. the only difference was that your affair with others was physical and between you is love... unless love no longer exist, then it is physical... so for you to mentioned affair as the reason, while you are committing it also... then Fuck.. you are lower that my friend... unless my friend is not revealing all...

Taking the role

I am the 4th from 6 siblings. I am the 3rd from 4 male siblings. With the passing of my eldest brother, I am now the 2nd from the 3male siblings. In our culture, man has greater responsibilities among others, protecting the well-being of the woman in this case my 2 sisters plus 3 sister-in-laws unless these ladies are married, the male siblings responsibility is secondary. The primary goes to the husbands. During 3rd in line, I usually run from those responsibilities because I have two other older brothers that I count on. Like representing the family to a wedding of a relatives or family's friends. Or be a banker for other family members. But now, things has changed. I am no longer can put all those burdens on my only older brother. I have to carry some of the weights. I have to be a role model, i.e more to roles than model :) to my nephews and nieces, which normally I don't. Please pray me to be both.

Loss of a brother

In the beginning, there was 6 and today 6Oct2016, 5 remains

Brother in Hospital

Last Sunday, my mum told me that my eldest brother was admitted to the hospital and it was not clear the reasons and his conditions were. My mum was in Penang for a family reunion and my sister in law (SIL), phoned her to tell the news and that she was crying. My brother for the past years have been treated for high blood pressure and then followed by failing kidney(s) and weak heart. My brother was in and out of the hospital BUT the thing is HE NEVER MADE A FOLLOW UP AND TAKING HIS MEDICINES. At one time, he went to Seremban Hospital instead of Putrajaya Hospital because he does not want to be "scolded" by the Putrajaya Hospital's doctor for not taking his medicines and follow-up session. Even recently, Seremban Hospital called me to persuade my brother to come and do his follow-ups. So for me, if not the rest of the family members it is like, OK again (while rolling my eyes). My mum asked me to call my SIL and visit. So I called and SIL told me that he had a stroke and arteries in brain burst/exploded (direct translation). Ok this is serious! Followed by a Whatsapp Family Group, SIL inform that she cannot think straight and wants any of the family to be there to listen the doctor's explanation. So, beside myself, my two brothers drove all the way to Putrajaya. The doctor explained. Analogy is this... if 100 is high risk, my brother condition is 200, extreme high risk. The blood clot in his brains is as big as an apple, and it is smashing the brain, unless part of his skull is taken off. coupled to this, high blood pressure, weak heart and failing kidney(s), the surgeon does not want to perform an operation. So for the past 2 days, the hospital was my home. He is now less critical but yes, still in the ICU, Intensive Care Unit. Can I ask where the dudes in Putrajaya, it seems the nearest to me is around 5-6miles according to Grindr.

Nay To Marriage Questions

OK I am a discrete rainbow... I am 37 years old... all of my siblings are married... In our culture, marriage is something everyone has to go through. It is a way of life. Having children is a blessing. The more you have to more bless you are. That is why, under paid and relaying on Social Assistance parents will have minimum 6-12 children... Now, I am not married and single. So? why others are so concern about my marriage life? In fact, wondering my relatives like they haven't seen me growing up? my siblings also... you know what I were... yes, I do play football, games bla bla..bla.. but I also played dolls... I also tried my little sister dress.. I weaved also... arent those not clear enough!!! :) Keep of harassing me with questions i.e Girlfriends, marriage n bla bla..the best part is, the one who are asking: 1) My divorced aunty- she was an old virgin when married, which after my parent introduced her to a convert. that only lasted for a month. 2) My problematic aunty- the rest of the family hates her . another fact, her so-called golden boy, is now married with 2 children and jobless for more 5 years by choice... Should I confronted them? I always believe I should, but I understand, the consequences that I need face if I did... :(

Model my ass...

Have you ever have a friend, that is average looking, average height (shorter than me), average body structure and everything is average but with an outstanding claim... claiming himself a model... underwear model to be precise.... Yes, I am rolling my eyes... I unfollowed him in FB but unfortunately I can unfollow him in Instagram, becoz I understand he has this apps that track followers. Yes, I am still a friends of his, it is just the postings are giving me negative responds and it feels like vomiting. Most people that are negative to me, I will usually unfollow bcoz I don't want to receive negative vibes from them. and yes, I am still their friends. Back to this particular friend, I really...really...really don't understand him. Claimed went to this bla bla bla for shooting... but most of the pics are in a studio setting, like you pay RM500 per session then you get yourselves an album. He claims its for a magazine this and that... but I am not seeing them with your pics in it! Beside that, I understand he works in the hotel line, which is fine... but do you need to brag about your exclusive position and you only entertain VVIP only... YES with a DOUBLE V. contrast to you claim, your work suits does not really represent the status... but yeah... what ever... I still meet him, but trying hard to avoid him... unfortunately he thinks I am his best friend and that I believe that he is a model... (probably he failed to notice my eyes were rolling every time he brags..) So how? ...

Secrets

One of my dear friend is now in a relationship. I hope this one last...  

I don't understand why some if not most partners keep their past sexual activities from their partner's knowledge and acts like a virgin. Yes, probably not in instant but the idea of not sharing is something puzzling.

The idea that your partner will not accept you after knowing your past is ridiculous. If he/she cannot accept you, means he/she is not for you. Is your partner a virgin also?

I always share my past with my ex-partners not for competition but to tell, that after all that he/she is the best person for me (at least at that time :)) and that I am here for him/her for good.  

Why then I am single? good question! I can only say, I haven't met the best among the best... or probably I will die fat and alone and be found three weeks later half-eaten by dogs.. ok that's from Bridget Jones Diary..